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No Doubt about it

December 23, 2013

Music is huge for me.  I connect with it and feel like it speaks to my soul.  The band No Doubt is one of the major soul touchers for me.  I love everything about them, but especially her lyrics.  Many times I will put one of their CD’s in and its like she is speaking for me.  When Return of Saturn came out I was excited for new music from them.  I had my mom pick me up at lunch that Tuesday it came out to go buy the CD and the cassette tape so that I could listen to it in the car.  That should give you a time frame of when it came out, CD players were not in cars yet at that time, or at least not in our 1989 Toyota.

I unwrapped the cassette, pulled out the booklet and put the tape in the player.  I read the lyrics as I listened to the new music and I was so disappointed.  I couldn’t relate to the music.  Songs like, Marry me, Return to Saturn, Magic’s in the make-up, all of them really.  They were more low-key and slow.  All the words were about how lost she was and how  she just wanted to get married and have a family….A simple kind of life.

A couple of years ago a friend text me, “Man, you really got to give Return of Saturn another chance.  Its your life”, the text read.

I plugged my Ipod in and put the CD on shuffle.  He was right, its my life, a little more dramatized but the basic fears of being almost 30, having a good career but torn with wanting the simple things and not knowing if I am good enough to have them.  Words like, “I always thought, I’d be a mom.  Sometimes I wish for a mistake.”  Last year I saw them perform this song and when she sang this line she stopped to hold back tears and the crowd exploded.  I get goose bumps thinking about it.  This entire CD, all the songs, the heaviness of that very line all for nothing.  She stood there, in front of thousands of people singing about a fear that was gone.  She now is married with two kids and one on the way.  She got her dream life, it was a really powerful moment.  It gives me hope when I think about that moment.  I always thought that I would be a stay at home mom.  As I approach 30 the window of opportunity seems smaller.  I know it is still possible for me but with a boyfriend in another state and a new exciting job on the horizon, I am not sure where it will fit.  It sounds stupid that I can love and connect with someone who I will never know, but her lyrics make so much sense to me.  If THEE Gwen Stefani can have fears and get over them, then so can I.

Even now, as I listen to the CD, her words are about struggling with a long distant relationship, “Sip my morning tea but you’re not next to me, there goes another day.  Driving in my car, I wonder where you are, as our favorite music plays.  And we’re on the phone, we’re all alone but it just aint good enough”.  UGH, it’s like so me.  That little old her can feel like little old me and she had no clue.  I just love it.  There are times that I can’t put words to my feelings but she can.

Magic’s in the Make-up, “Can you tell I’m faking it?  But I want to be myself.  The counterfeit disposition can’t be good for my health.  So many different faces depending on my different places, my personality changes…”.  I hear these words today and I am like, MAN, that’s me.

I really could quote every line they have ever written and gone on and on about how much it means to me but I wont.  I was just having a good No Doubt jam-athon and thought, I wish everyone could listen to these songs and feel the feelings I am feeling.  My boyfriend has to deal with me in the car going, “Man, did you hear that line?  So good!”  So I thought I would share it with you guys too.  Enjoy the holidays!!

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  1. Shaena permalink

    Omg, I love that album!

  2. I was a fan of Tragic Kingdom back in the day – had the cassette too..ha ha. I wasn’t crazy about their brand new one, although it certainly had their trademark sound. Maybe I’ll give it another shot. It’s amazing how deep music can hit us at different times, eh? Thanks for sharing this 🙂

    Love and light,

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